Courtney Robertson knows exactly what you remember.
Season 16 of The Bachelor. The tell-all book. The word villain that followed her for years, whether she asked for it or not. But what’s interesting about Courtney now is how little she flinches at that label. She’s not trying to erase it. She’s reframing it.
Today, she’s happily married, living in Arcadia, raising three kids under five, hosting a podcast, working as a realtor, and stepping into a full-circle television moment that feels tailor-made for this chapter. HGTV’s The Bachelor Mansion Takeover brings her back to the franchise’s most iconic house, this time helping reimagine it through competitive design challenges alongside former contestants.
For our Home issue, we’re spending time with Courtney where life actually happens… at home. Older, wiser, more protective of her peace, and more willing than ever to say the quiet part out loud. What follows is her story, in her words, shaped by experience, perspective, and the freedom that comes with building a life beyond the headlines.
You told me I can ask you anything.
Yeah, I’m an open book. I wrote a tell-all called I Didn’t Come Here to Make Friends. I did The Bachelor season 16 with Ben Flajnik. It was so long ago. I was 28. Now I’m 42, married with kids.
Do people still call you the villain?
Yes and no. People’s memories fade a bit, and some know me now from other chapters of my life. But at the end of the day, that’s still what a lot of people recognize me for.
Does that word bother you?
It did initially, but now I just embrace it. I was a little spicy. And I wasn’t boring.
Going into it, did you want love, airtime, chaos, or did you know you’d be cast as the villain?
I was winging it. I hadn’t really watched The Bachelor religiously, but I watched Ben on Ashley Hebert’s finale. I always liked tuning in at the end and thought he was cute.
I’d been living in LA since I was 20 modeling and had a pretty successful career, which I’m proud of. I dated actors. I had an exciting 20s. But I was 28 and thought, I really do want to settle down. I thought I’d be married with kids by then. Clearly, that didn’t go as planned.
I was watching this winemaker from Sonoma with Arizona roots, where I grew up. He went to U of A. He proposed and got dumped on the spot. I’d just gone through a breakup, so I took my chances. I went online, filled out the questionnaire, and got a call the next day.
That was fast.
Very fast. I met with ABC and was offered a contract. They wouldn’t tell me it was him, but I had a gut feeling.
Fast forward, I filmed for two and a half months and got engaged in Switzerland. ABC is top-notch. The travel is amazing, but there were definitely nights where I was like, I need to cut myself off from the red wine.
Back then it wasn’t like Love Island or the shows now. My actions were taboo. Kelly Ripa slut-shamed me for it.
How did that feel?
Not good. I’m not a fan of Kelly Ripa. And I even grew up watching All My Children.
I knew I rubbed some girls the wrong way and they got more and more fueled up. Girls can be annoying. But I did make good friends, especially the producers.
People don’t realize how controlled that environment is.
You can’t do anything without someone with you. Literally. If you need to go to the bathroom, they’re there. They can’t let you out of their sight. Every girl had a handler and mine became my best friend.
But editing really has its ways. I remember watching night one and they basically only showed me saying I’m a model and I deserve the ring. My jaw was on the floor. I knew instantly I was set up to be the villain.
So they kind of wrote the script?
Don’t get me wrong, I take accountability. But people either love me or love to hate me, and that made for good TV.
However, you're also a human with feelings.
Yes. And I was engaged to the guy. That’s what made my season so bizarre. Normally the villain isn’t who he ends up with. He ends up with the good girl.
Ben went on Ellen and she told him I was playing him. Mean. I was on the cover of Us Weekly for five weeks straight. When Whitney Houston passed away, I got one week off from being on the cover of every magazine.
Were you in love with him?
I felt like I was. We were together for a year after. We tried.
I remember driving back to Arizona to escape the breakup. I was sad not just because the relationship ended, but because people were rooting for us.
Then he said something in a magazine because he was hurt, like he should have listened to the girls. We were together for a year. That was really cutting.
It took me many years to rebuild my public life and to trust people again. I constantly felt like I had something to prove.
You grew up in Arizona.
Yes. I was a Hopi Hawk. I went to Ingleside. I went to Arcadia. I started modeling my senior year because I worked at Fashion Square for $5.25 an hour. That’s how I got my first modeling job. Abercrombie.
Were you a girl’s girl in high school?
I was a tomboy. I did cheer but hated it and switched to basketball. I was creative, and always had great girlfriends.
Looking back, would you do it again?
After the relationship ended, I said I regretted it because I lost my privacy. I’m actually a very private person now. But experience is what makes your life full.
Writing my book helped me realize I’ve lost and found myself many times in this lifetime. I now love having a podcast space. And most recently, filming HGTV was such a full-circle moment and really therapeutic.
Let’s talk about HGTV. What exactly is The Bachelor Mansion Takeover?
Such a cool concept. The mansion hadn’t really changed since my season. It looks great on camera, but was pretty run down.
HGTV came in and said we’re going to completely redo the mansion, and we’re going to do it with former Bachelor contestants. There were twelve of us competing in design challenges, all working toward transforming the house.
Was it strange being back?
Walking into that house brought up many memories. That’s where everything started for me. But this time it felt different. I wasn’t there for love. I wasn’t there to be judged. I was there to compete and create.
It felt healing in a weird way.
How competitive was it?
Way more competitive than I expected. There's money on the line, so it's not just lighthearted fun. People made alliances. Teams lose and you have to eliminate someone on the spot.
What were the challenges like?
Real design work. Paint colors. Furniture. Decor. You could even take down walls if you wanted.
Jesse Palmer hosted. Tyler Cameron and Tayshia Adams were the judges, and each challenge had guest judges. Seeing how HGTV works behind the scenes was incredible. The crew was awesome.
Did it take time to feel comfortable back on camera?
Yes. The last time I was on TV, I was 28. Now I’ve had three kids. There was a pool challenge and I remember thinking, skinny dipping is the last thing I want to do.
There were interviews where they wanted it to feel more HGTV and toned down, which actually helped. This wasn’t about drama or love. It was about competing.
Did the experience change how you see TV now?
It reminded me that I can do this on my terms. It pushed me to speak up and trust my instincts. There were a lot of strong personalities and clashing ideas, but it forced me to find my voice again.
How did you write the tell-all book legally?
It was hard. I wrote a sample chapter, found a co-author, and a book agent. I got four no’s before Harper Collins called.
I announced it on E! News and immediately got a cease and desist. Harper Collins handled it. A lot of the book isn’t about The Bachelor. It’s about growing up in Arizona, modeling, dating, moving to LA, and what wasn’t shown on camera.
It gave me anxiety and sleepless nights. Ben messaged me saying I’d hear from his attorney, but I never did because everything was legally vetted.
Did you and Ben ever speak again?
Not for years. Then he reached out a year before I met my husband. He said he was watching our season and wished me Merry Christmas.
We met in Santa Barbara and put a bow on that chapter. Do I feel peace? Oh yeah.
He didn’t read the book. He asked me not to write anymore. We’re both happily married. I wouldn’t change a thing.
How was the book received?
It hit the New York Times bestseller list for five weeks. My first call was my dad. He screamed.
I struggled in school. I never felt smart. My sister got straight As. So the things I’ve accomplished, I’m really proud of. And it helps young women who feel awkward or out of place.
Do you still watch The Bachelor?
Mostly for my podcast After Reality. I started it during Covid after I had my first baby. Becoming a mom can feel like a loss of identity. I couldn’t watch Sesame Street all day. I needed real conversation.
Friendships shift. People fade. There are lonely moments. So I created a space for unedited, long-form conversations.
It started with villains. Now it’s more about parenting and real life. It can be a lonely, thankless job.
How did you meet your husband?
Instagram. He liked my photos for two years. He didn’t even follow me, so I Googled him to make sure he was real.
Our first date was at Los Dos Molinos. He’s an Arizona guy with law school in New York. That little edge. Now we have three kids.
And he’s never watched my season.
What kind of mom are you?
The good cop. I’m a free spirit, but I can crack the whip.
There’s a lot of music in our house. Dancing, singing, arts and crafts. My kids are solar powered. Just get them outside.
I’m still figuring it out. Mom friends are hard. But turning 40 changes you. You stop caring so much. You have boundaries. You’re more confident.
It’s an interesting time to be a woman.
Do you want to stay immersed in TV?
I’d love to do more with HGTV or even Food Network. It’s a fun way to make a living and to show your kids that mom has a sense of self.
instagram.com/bugrobertson
Listen to the full, unfiltered podcast interview with Courtney Robertson, on Now With Nadine, hosted by PVCL owner Nadine Bubeck. Streaming everywhere.
"Don’t get me wrong, I take accountability. But people either love me or love to hate me, and that made for good TV."
"Turning 40 changes you. You stop caring so much. You have boundaries. You’re more confident. It’s an interesting time to be a woman."