For Robert Dugan and Renee Trepagnier, love and work are not separate spheres. They are intertwined by shared values, mutual trust and a belief that care — for oneself, for each other and for the wider community — is a radical act.
As the founders of Here I Am Self-Care, a self-care marketplace focused on women that is rooted in sustainability and equity, Dugan and Trepagnier navigate the unique challenge of being both life partners and business partners. The key, they say, lies in alignment.
“We are definitely like minded in terms of the big goal,” Renee said. “We can have different opinions or see things differently and talk about it, and decide to agree or disagree, but ultimately we know we’re always following that same guiding light.”
That shared foundation makes disagreement navigable rather than divisive. Robert said they entered both their relationship and their business knowing they held the same core values.
“For a long time, from the beginning, we shared similar, if not the same, values in most of the big questions,” he said. “That’s half the battle.”
While their approaches may differ, the mission remains constant. Renee describes Here I Am Self-Care as both a call inward and a collective effort outward.
“The goal is to inspire women to really stop and make sure their care is looked after,” she said. “But also to support women-led small businesses that are trying to grow their own businesses. It’s a ripple effect of women caring for each other and caring for themselves.”
Robert framed that work as a broader disruption of entrenched systems.
“Self care is not narcissism,” he said. “It’s self compassion and empathy for your body and your mind.”
That philosophy shapes how they show up for each other day to day. Renee admits she sometimes needs reminders to slow down.
“I need reminding because I’m going to forget to take a break or drink water,” she said. “Those kind reminders of, ‘Hey, you have to treat yourself as well,’ I really appreciate that.”
Robert, who has navigated significant health challenges, relies on Renee's attention to detail and curiosity about wellness.
“She’s endlessly fascinated by how to act on that value,” he said. “What are the right ingredients to use, what are the right products. She’s my go-to encyclopedia.”
Their shared belief in questioning cultural norms — around work, health and productivity — is central to both their relationship and their business.
“This is a form of resistance against the popular version of what’s good and bad for you,” Robert said.
As a couple, they make space for joy and connection through simple rituals. Movies, shared meals and reading together are essential pauses from the intensity of building a company.
“You can’t work all day and all night,” Renee said. “At some point, you have to stop.”
Reading has become a particular bond.
“We share the ideas of the book and the thoughts that come out of it,” Robert said. “It’s a learning experience.”
Building Here I Am Self-Care together has deepened their partnership in ways neither fully anticipated. Trepagnier credits Robert with encouraging her to take risks she might not have taken alone.
“I probably would have quit after the first month,” she said. “But for Robert to always be like, ‘Don’t give up. Look at the bigger picture,’ that made all the difference.”
For Robert, the process has strengthened communication and trust.
“We haven’t set up battlegrounds,” he said. “We believe in each other. I trust in your strength, and you trust in my strength.”
They met in Austin, Texas in 2016, but post-pandemic van travel brought them west. Long Beach, they said, felt like home — a place where community, creativity and care could thrive.
As Valentine’s Day approaches, both point to honesty as the cornerstone of love.
“If somebody really loves you for all of you, your honesty will strengthen the relationship, even if you see things differently," Renee said.
Robert agreed.
“Knowing you have a partner who will drop anything in a heartbeat to care for you when necessary,” he said, “you can’t beat it. That’s the magic.”
About Here I Am Self-Care:
Renee and Robert co-founded Here I Am Self-Care in 2022 as a purpose driven online retail business. Their curated self-care boxes and sustainable wellness products are designed for women of all ages and stages of life. Each item — from soothing aromatherapy candles to rejuvenating skincare — is non-toxic and sustainable with low/zero waste packaging, and sourced from women-owned small businesses. A certified B Corporation, the company meets high standards of verified performance, accountability and transparency.
Visit hereiambox.com to learn more.
We believe in each other. I trust in your strength, and you trust in my strength.