“Face your challenges head-on” is sage advice most American men receive early and often. Unfortunately, when it comes to mental health, the unspoken expectation has been the polar opposite.
As a career educator, coach and therapist, over the past 20 years I have seen countless boys and young men struggle to find their purpose and reach their potential. While most would be diagnosed as mentally stable, few had embraced mental fitness. Just as living a physically sedentary lifestyle leads to atrophy and disease, neglecting one’s mind and soul is a costly choice.
Today, stigma around men’s mental health is receding – thanks in a large part to pragmatic, results-oriented approaches dominating the zeitgeist. From bestsellers like Atomic Habits to groundbreaking research on grit, happiness and achievement, personal growth is no longer taboo.
My own work in male development across the lifespan sits at the center of this shift. I think of what I do as coaching clients in mental fitness, pursuant of mental health. My clients range from adolescents in chaotic, identity-forming years to men navigating complex – often lonely – terrain, from growth to grief.
Your doctor would tell you to start that fitness program before the heart attack. A dietician would encourage you to eat well before you pack on the pounds. I’m telling you to deal with your challenges and train your mind before a crisis.
In pursuing mental strength, men and boys develop the capacity they need to handle life's heavy lifts. Leadership, marriage, parenthood, change – even good things require strength and stability. Conversely, loss, stress, depression and anxiety will only get worse if left unaddressed.
My work is distinct in its dual focus. As a lifelong academic and coach, I bring a therapeutic lens and a results-oriented approach to my practice. I meet each client exactly where they are. Most often, we get to work dismantling the mental and emotional blocks keeping them suffering, stuck or adrift. Whether I'm working with a teenager or an executive, my practice always combines psychological insight and actionable guidance.
In twenty years, I have seen the many shapes of male struggle. Middle schoolers paralyzed by social pressures. Teens numbing their confusion and anxieties with drugs and alcohol. Young men shirking responsibility and missing out on meaning. Accomplished men quietly carrying the weight of their worlds, yet feeling empty.
Questions of meaning are central to my work. I help clients understand the meaning their lives hold every single day. Small choices, quiet moments of integrity, and big decisions all shape who you are becoming. The most rewarding part of my work is watching a client move from a state of wandering to one of intentional living, grounded in hard-won clarity.
Ultimately, men of all ages should know that working on your mental health is far from a sign of weakness. It’s a mark of strength.
I welcome families, adolescents, and men of all ages to my practice at Brentwood Counseling Services in Maryland Farms. To learn more, schedule a consultation by emailing admin@brentwoodcounseling.com or calling (615) 377-1153.